Questions answered…
A couple of posts ago I asked my readers to ask questions if they had any…..I only received a couple but figured I would answer them in this post….
Mandy asked…What do you consider to be the three most significant days of your life?
Um I am really bad with these types of questions…because generally I have no idea. But probably the day I started highschool, the day I arrived in Japan for the first time and the day I met Shumpei. Just because they all made me the person I am now I guess….By the time I started highschool I was so ready for it…I needed to be in highschool and after coming from a very small Catholic primary school it was all so different. The day I arrived in Japan because obviously if I had never come to Japan on exchange that year then I never would of learnt to speak Japanese, make so many friends here and decided to come back. I say the day I met Shumpei is significant because he is the man I am going to marry!
Oh and meeting you Mandy when we were 4 as well!!! hehehe!
Sara asked… Kind of a geek questions but what manga do you have?
Actually I have no manga. I never really got into the manga craze but I once read Nana (like the first 2) and another one which I think was called Peach Girl. I am more of a Japanese drama girl….my favourites being Orange Days, Boku dake no madonna, Regatta and a recent drama called Puropozo Daisakusen!
Nay asked... Just to help you out with your blog posts, here is a question from me!
Would you say that your move back to Australia is filled more with excitement of going home, or sadness for leaving Japan? How is Shun feeling about coming to Australia for 1 year, giving up his job, losing his spot in the “Japanese job market” etc?
I think that my move back to Australia is filled with both excitement and sadness…I will only be gone a year though and I know Japan will still be here when I get back. I am a little nervous about going home….for me as well as Shumpei. I am nervous for myself because it is has been 2 and a half years since I lived back in Australia and even then I was only there for 10 months while I finished uni….most of my close friends are here in Japan and most of my close friends in Australia are no longer in Brisbane bar a couple! So that will be difficult because I have such a great support network of friends here in Tokyo who I will miss so much. But my family is in Australia and I need to be with them for awhile. I am nervous for myself also because I will need to find work and I know how stressful that can be! I am nervous for Shumpei because he is leaving his job and his friends and family behind and his motivation to do this is me….that is a lot to bear. As most of you know Shumpei`s English is not great and while it is getting better all the time he can`t really hold a conversation with someone that doesn`t understand Japanese…while he understands English quite well now he finds it very difficult to respond in English. I am hoping this will get better while we are in Australia.
It took Shumpei a very long time to decide to come with me. I had decided that I would be going back for six months whether or not he came with me or not because I needed to be with my family and he understood that. I gave him the choice and said that he could come of course….when he finally told me he was coming I cried. He had been thinking about it for about three months already and I really thought he wouldn`t come. As for giving up his job I think this is what he had to think about most. As some of you know the job market here is weird….people do not change jobs willy nilly and most stay with the same company for life. While this is changing a lot more now it is almost unheard of for someone to leave a job unless they already have a job lined up. Shun`s company has actually told him that he might be able to come back to his old job after 1 year….
I think the pressure from his family about leaving his job was more the problem that his own feelings about it.
Christelle asked …I’d love to hear more about your wedding plans, I know you said you couldn’t think about much before going to Australia, but you must have some image in your mind? Traditional wedding? Garden wedding? His family going to Australia for the ceremony? Big? Small?
When people ask me about my wedding plans I never know what to say because basically I haven`t done any. I never grew up thinking `OMG at my wedding I want to do this this and this` In fact I had never really given it much thought. But we have told quite a few people we are engaged and I am ultimately always asked the `What will you do for your wedding` question.
So far we have booked a venue…I wanted a place where we could have the ceremony and reception at the same place because we will have international guests most of which would not have transport to different venues. I also wanted it to be fairly local to the area that my parents live so my mum helped me book a place that had received some good reviews and had recently been done-up. We will be having a garden wedding and the reception in one of the function wedding rooms on site. The best thing is that this place also has a motel on the grounds so international guests will have a place (super close!) to stay!!! While I am Catholic, I never really had this huge desire to get married in a church and I quite like the idea of a garden wedding!
I have asked three friends to be bridesmaids! Catherine (who is here in Tokyo), a highschool friend Clare (who lives in Mt Isa for work) and Mandy (who reads and comments on my blog) who is my best friend from primary school and she lives in London. So yes my bridesmaids live in three different countries and none of them live in Brisbane where the wedding will be (Although Mandy and Clare are from Brisbane originally!) Shumpei has asked our friend James to be best man because we thought it would be best to ask someone that spoke English! hehe….It is great because James speaks Japanese fluently also! While James is actually originally my friend him and Shun have gotten really close and it was Shumpei who suggested we ask James (Although Shumpei had no idea what a best man was as the time) Shumpei has mentioned to a couple of his friends that he will need two more friends to be groomsmen it is something we can`t really decide right now because we are not exactly sure who is coming but I think he will ask two of his university friends! Having all of the wedding party so far away will make dress fittings for bridesmaids dresses a nightmare!
As for a theme, I am actually going to steal Nay`s idea (Don`t worry I asked her) and have a cherry blossom theme…as you can tell from my blog I love them!). While the wedding is in Australia Shumpei and I met in Japan, he is Japanese and ultimately we will be living here so it is very important for me to include something from Japan. I am not exactly sure how I will work it in but am thinking of cherry blossom invitations, cake, favors and maybe some decorations! Not really sure yet though and will have to wait til I get back to Australia before I decide anything for sure. I have also heard of a tradition they do in hawaii where they fold 1001 cranes which grants you happiness in your marriage. I like this because origami cranes are Japanese and I could give some to the guests etc but again not really sure about this.
I have no idea about colours yet though, this part is difficult as I love pink! and would love my bridesmaids to wear pink and for me to have pink flowers etc but I am not 100% sure yet. So maybe pink, silver and white for colours….
The wedding is not going to be very big. Maybe about 50 people. I thought less at first but I think a lot of Shumpei and my friends here in Japan might actually make it over for the wedding which would be fantastic. Obviously Cat and James are definitely coming but some other friends have said they would love to also!!! Shun`s parents are coming and maybe his grandmother and brother too!
The next question I am sure will be about the dress but this is something I really do have no idea about!
Because we will be having the ceremony in Australia a lot of people have asked whether we will be doing a ceremony in Japan also and at this stage the answer is no. But when we return we will have a ni ji kai for our friends and probably some kind of dinner with Shumpei`s extended family!
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I haven’t been home in over two years, and while I hope to go back and visit soon, it would be hard for me to just move back.
But, like you said, Japan will still be here in one year, so I guess that kind of positive thinking will help you through.
It takes me ages to get used to living in Oz again… I have a love/hate relationship with Japan, but I sure as hell miss it when I’m not there!! You are right - Japan will still be there when you come back, but I guess coz I’m so emotional, the thought of not having “a home” to return to really affected me. When Naoki decided to move into the dormitory, I thought it was the end of the world - I thought he was giving up “our home” and “our life”. You wouldn’t believe how much it hurt… Then arriving back to Japan, and staying at “Naoki’s” house killed me… I just wanted “our life” to continue the same as it had, but obviously it couldn’t. Well that’s my story!
I’m excited about you coming back to Oz, I can finally meet up with you! And I can’t believe where you are getting married! Did I mention that it was one of the places mum and I thought about? It is about a 5 minute walk from my Aunt’s house, and my mum used to live in the apartment’s directly across, and up the road from the reception area!! Our wedding is going to be about 50 people too… nice and intimate! We have the problem of our groomsmen not being able to speak english (i mean, not AT ALL!!), but it will work out somehow!!
Sadly… Naoki wouldn’t leave his job for me yet… But he has put down Australia as one of his work place preferences (his company is international). I guess that is a start!
Hi
Thanks for popping into my blog. I stumbled in here and it’s almost your last day in Japan! but not for long by the sounds of it.
I got married in New Zealand 8 years ago. We got married by the sea. Upon our return we had a big lunch for the extended family and all the employees at my husband’s company. It was great!
The best thing we did was go on a really lavish honeymoon since my husband has not been able to take a decent holiday since then.
Congratulations on your engagement and all the best back in Oz.
How’s your packing going?!
Congratulations on the upcoming wedding. I am married to a Japanese as well - not planned but definitely happened. I, too am one of the lucky girls around since everytime I ask him if it’s ok for me to work in Japan or abroad, he always answers, “anywhere as long as we’re together”. Hmm, mushy Jap - a rare breed don’t you think so.
Anyway, best wishes and goodluck to your life together!
BTW, I bloghopped to your site from my site (http://theparentingdiaries.com) where you left a comment in my WW post.